Frostpaw's Guide To Life
by Frostfire of ThunderClan
Summary: Rules for... This is a guide to living with certain cats! Young Frostpaw has a lot to learn before she becomes a ThunderClan warrior. This guide will help her!
1. Jayfeather and Tigerstar

_Guide to living with Jayfeather_

**1. Don't acknowledge that he's blind**

"Hey, Jayfeather!" Frostpaw says.

"What do you need?" Jayfeather says, bored.

"Well... You don't know what I look like, do you? And have you ever seen the color red? I'm just wondering."

Jayfeather narrowed his eyes. "Actually, I can see I'm my dreams, and red is the color of leaves."

"Leaves are green."

"Only half of the year."

"How did you know?"

"Because I can see in my dreams, and I'm not dumb! All cats know that."

"What about purple?"

"DIEEEEEEEE!" Jayfeather springs on Frostpaw.

**2. Do help him if needed**

"Fire!" "Everyone run!"

Frostpaw rushed to the medicine den. "Jayfeather, Let me help you!" Jayfeather turns around, looking distressed, but hisses.

"No!"

"Here, just grab my tail."

Jayfeather hesitates. "Please!" Frostpaw insists.

Jayfeather touches Frostpaw's tail.

- They make it out of camp-

"Thanks." Jayfeather mumbles.

"No problem!" Frostpaw says.

_Guide to living with Tigerstar_

**1. Don't live with him**

Frostpaw sees Tigerstar eating fresh kill in the woods, alone. She feels sorry for him. She approaches cautiously.

Tigerstar whirls around, "Who's there?!" He demands.

"Only me," Frostpaw steps out of the bushes. "I saw you looking lonely, and I wanted to ask you to join ThunderClan."

Tigerstar puts on his poker face. "Why, of course. You have such a generous soul, to ask an old thing like me to join a clan."

Frostpaw, happy, leads him back to camp.

-One moon later, in their battle with ShadowClan-

"Oh, why did we _ever_ let Tigerstar stay with us?!" Frostpaw yells at herself. "Of course he had to be a spy!"

**2. Do **_**not**_ **live with him**

Get it? I'm doing a do and a don't for each one, and this is a do _not_? No? Not funny? Okay… pretty much just stay away from Tigerstar.

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><p><strong>Okay, I hope you guys liked this! I'll be doing two for each chapter. Please comment on who should I make a guide to life about next. Thanks! -Frost<strong>


	2. Hollyleaf and Bramblestar

_Guide to living with Hollyleaf_

**1. Don't break the warrior code around her, she's a stickler for rules**

Frostpaw walks over to Leafpaw, her friend. "Hey, do you want to eat? We've already hunt, and I'm tired." Leafpaw stands up.

"Yeah, I want some juice mouse!" Leafpaw says. Frostpaw laughs, and her and Leafpaw tumble/ run over to the fresh kill pile.

Suddenly, Hollyleaf comes up and stands in front of them. "Are you eating now?"

The two 'paws nod.

"Have you fed the elders?"

"No, but-" Frostpaw starts.

"No buts!" Hollyleaf snaps. "Bring them food. Feed your clan before yourself." Then she stalks off.

**2. Do help her with hunting, and other chores**

"Hey, Hollyleaf!" Frostpaw pads up to her. "Do you need help with anything?"

Hollyleaf looks up from patching a hole in the nursery wall, and smiles. "Thanks for offering! Sure, if you could get more branches from the forest, that would be great! You can just get the fallen twigs from the ground."

Frostpaw nods, and dashes out of camp.

Hollyleaf's green eyes shimmer with delight. "Aaah, I remember when I was an apprentice." She smiles.

_Guide to Living with Bramblestar (claw)_

**1. Don't bring up his father**

Frostpaw walks up to Bramblestar.

"Hey, you're an awesome leader… but… how do you do it? With your father and all?"

Bramblestar growls. "I chose my path a long time ago. We all must choose. Have you chose yours? Silly apprentice, of course you haven't. Get out of my sight!"

Frostpaw backs away.

**2. Do help him with his relationship problems**

"Hey, Bramblestar, how do you feel about you and Squirrelflight? I want to be a wise cat, and give advice!"

Bramblestar sighs. "Well… I know what she did was for good, but it's just hard to accept. I still love her. I just wish I could tell her."

_Hmmmmmm,_ Frostpaw has an idea!

She runs up to Squirrelflight. "How do you feel about you and Bramblestar?"

Squirrelflight grimaces. "Well, I just want things to get back to the way that they used to be."

Frostpaw grins. "Great, because Bramblestar says it's hard to accept, but he still loves you!"

Squirrelflight looks up. "Really? I love him too!"

Frostpaw grins. "Yup, you're welcome."

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><p><strong>Aaah, Bramblestar. Okay, I hope you enjoyed, and please comment on what else Frostpaw should and shouldn't do!" -Frost<strong>


	3. Berrynose and Crowfeather

**Sorry I took so long with the update, my robotic house got run over by a giant sheep while I was vacationing in ****Calofornia with my cousins and their** **pet unicorn, Shiloh.**

* * *

><p><em>Guide to living with Berrynose<em>

**1. Don't tell him that he's stuck up, so lie**

"Hey, Berrynose." Berrynose sticks his head up from his soft miss nest.

"What is it, Frostpaw? ShadowClan better be invading because I need my sleep."

"Actually, Bramblestar says to wake up all the cats. He's called a meeting," Frostpaw says matter-of-factly.

"Stupid apprentice! You should have woken me up last!" Berrynose growls, and stand up.

"You're so stuck up!" Frostpaw yells. "It's a wonder Firestar even made you a warrior! You should have been named Berrystump-tail!"

"Mrowwww!" Berrynose jumps on Frostpaw.

-CUT CUT CUT!- (Hey, why is it that a lot of these end in Frostpaw getting mauled?She might end up like Brightheart if I'm not careful...)

**2. Ignore his spiteful comments**

Berrynose is at the fresh kill pile, picking out some food. Frostpaw pads up, and begins to look, too.

Frostpaw sees a plump mouse and comments,"There's a nice one."

"Mine!" Berrynose says, and snatches it.

Frostpaw frowns. "But I saw it first!"

"Well, I'm a warrior! When your a warrior, you can have all the plump mice."

Frostpaw doubted this, but said nothing. She just chose a small mouse and walked away.

_Guide to living with Crowfeather_

**1. Don't bring up wives or Leafpool or** **Nightcloud or Feathertail**

Frostpaw is hunting on the WindClan border when he spots Crowfeather

stalking a mouse.

"Hey, Crowfeather!" Frostpaw yelled.

The mouse skitters away, and Crowfeather looks up, annoyed.

"What do you want, ThunderClan apprentice?" Crofeather spat.

"Well," Frostpaw trots up to him, "Did you get to pick your warrior name? I mean, we all know that you liked 'Feather' because of Feathertail," Crowfeather hisses at this ," but did you ask for it?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"Because I want my warrior name to be Frostfalcon! I mean, doesn't it sound awesome!?" Frostpaw says excitedly.

Crowfeather says," Leave, and never come back. Don't anger senior warrior... Or else." Then he grabbed at a mouse hiding in the bushes, and held it up on one claw. Frostpaw gulped, then bolted.

**2. Do try to not talk to cats from other clans**

Frostpaw sees Crowfeather hunting on the WindClan side of the border, and debates going up to him. But then she thinks it better to talk to cats from her own clan.

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><p><strong>Do any of you remember Berrystump-tail? I do! He he he... Curiosity killed Frostpaw, the saying should go.<strong>

**Please give me more cats to write about!**

**-Frosty**


	4. Yellowfang and Dovewing

_Guide to living with Yellowfang_

**1. Don't bring up ShadowClan**

"Hey, Yellowfang!" Frostpaw says, walking into the medicine den.

"Are you sick, or just annoying?" Yellowfang grumbles.

"Ha ha, very funny. Actually, the whole clan thinks that ShadowClan might be attacking, so we want to make pre-cautions. Do you need any help collecting herbs? … Yellowfang?"

Yellowfang shivers, "S...s...ShadowClan?" She rasped. "They're coming for me! I just know it!" Then she starts writhing on the floor.

"Um... I'll be going now!" Frostpaw says, skidding out. "Man, she's lost her marbles," she mumbles.

**2. Do treat her like an elder (she's old, you know)**

Frostpaw gets two pieces of fresh kill from the pile. She eats one, but then takes the other to the medicine den.

"Yellowfang! I brought you food!" She calls.

Yellowfang pokes her nose out of a corner. "Food? Maybe you're not half bad, apprentice." Then she takes it, and eats it.

_Guide to living with Dovewing_

**1. Don't talk about seeing cats outside of Clans (*coughTigerheartcoughBumblestripe*)**

"Dovewing, it's against the warrior code to see cats from other clans, right?" Frostpaw asks.

Dovewing narrows her eyes. "True, but sometimes you just have to follow love and your heart!" Then she turns her nose up, and walks away.

**2. Do talk about love triangles**

"Dovewing, I need some advice…"

"On what?"

"Well, I think both Vinepaw and Owlpaw like me, and I like both of them, but I feel like their competing for me. What should I do?"

Dovewing lets out a mrrow of laughter. "Aaah, well, just follow your heart. And go for the sweeter, more sensable one."

Frostpaw smiles. "Thanks, Dovewing. You have the best advice."

Dovewing purrs, grinning.

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><p><strong>Well, there you have it, thanks for the idea Shirah the Mage. Keep the comments coming! -Frost<strong>


	5. Mapleshade and Twolegs

_Guide to living with Mapleshade_

**1. Don't bring up kits or perfect lives or…**

Frostpaw closes her eyes, letting sleep take her. Suddenly she opened her eyes, but she was not awake. Dark trees surrounded her. Rivers of blood bubbled behind her. She knew this place. This was the Place of No Stars, the Dark Forest. Frostpaw shivered. _What am I doing here?_ She thought. Suddenly a figure stepped out of the trees. "What are you doing here?"

"I…I don't know. I'm Frostpaw!"

"Mapleshade. Follow me." She hissed. Frostpaw slowly followed. When they reached a clearing, Mapleshade stopped. _Hmmm, I could train her as a dark forest warrior! _Mapleshade thought.

"Young apprentice, I will train you in the way of the dark forest. What knowledge do you seek?"

"Well, do you have kits?"

"I did… once… no more..."

"Do you have a perfect life?"

"…sure," Mapleshade growled,"do you want me to kill you now?"

"…sure!"

Mapleshade face-pawed. "Go home, before I do worse."

**2. Do not live with evil cats, unless **_**you**_ **are evil**

Need I say more?

_Guide to living with Twolegs! (This is a special)_

**1. Don't ask them for food, or try to approach them (not to mention this is AGAINST the warrior code! Frostpaw, how are you, like, NOT DEAD YET?!)**

Frostpaw was out hunting, when she saw a Twoleg home. Hmmm, she thought. I should just ask for food there, rather than hunt. Frostpaw approaches the twoleg. She sees the front door and a female twoleg comes out. Frostpaw goes up, and starts meowing pitifully. The twoleg gets a broom, and tries to sweep Frostpaw away,

'Scat cat!' She yells.

"Mrrow!" Frostpaw leaps away. _Well, that worked. Now I'll try the next house…_

**2. Do pick their herbs (I can tell you from experience, Twolegs don't use them that much!)**

Frostpaw is working with Jayfeather for the day, her mentor has a cold.

"So, Jayfeather? Where today?" An eager Frostpaw says.

Jayfeather looks at Frostpaw. "We need some marigold."

Frostpaw nods.

"We can find some in a Twoleg garden," Jayfeather continues.

Frostpaw and Jayfeather walk to the Twoleg garden, and then begin to pick marigold. When they are done, and their mouths are full of the orange flowers, they head back to ThunderClan.


End file.
